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Friday, April 29, 2011

TGIF?

Fridays for me always start out great yet always end up with me borderline depressed.  Let me explain, at the beginning of the workday I love Fridays. I mean I am all TGIF!! Yeah - "Cheers to the freakin' weekend", no work for two days and I'm going to have some rest and some fun.  This goes on till about 5pm when I get home and realize I have nothing to do. Now when I say nothing, you know that is not really true because I have two little women wanting snacks, dinner, candy and to stay up all night.  See they have NO problem with Friday nights.  But for me Friday nights have always been downers, even when I was single and childless.  I remember back then coming to my apartment and laying on my well worn green chenille couch (sadly yes) and staying in front of the TV till around 11pm, trying to fight off the tears  and finally giving in and going to bed. I have tried to escape the feeling with visits to friend's houses for playdates for mommy and the kids or having movie night at home.  Tonight I even went to family movie night with the girls at the new church we have been visiting. We watched Disney's Tangled  (http://adisney.go.com/disneypictures/tangled/), which turned out to be a cute and entertaining movie for us all - even the skater princess.  I thoroughly enjoyed myself  as well which came as a surprise because I am not big on fairy tales - the realist in me, I guess. However, as I was driving home that old familiar feeling began to creep up again and by the time I walked through my door it was there - waiting for me like a black cloud. 

After all these years, I have still not escaped it.  I have to get to the root of this! Time for me to ask my Daddy what to do. He will know what to do, He always does.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Too Long

It's been too long, way too long since I've had the urge to even think about putting a pen to paper or in this case my fingers to these keys. It's been too long, way too long since I have had a desire to share myself in this way with others.  So long in fact that I had to search this brain of mine to remember both the email address and password to even get into my blog account. How sad is that?  But today I began to get that itch again.  Some of my friends have been saying for awhile that I needed to start blogging again, but I just kept schlepping through my days with no direction.  Today for some reason, the light bulb went on, today I spoke the words aloud, "I think I am going to start blogging again". Yep I said that just out of the blue and you know when you speak things aloud that are in line with God's plan for you, He gives you confirmation.  My confirmation came less than an hour ago and in the same day I expressed my intent to begin writing again.  Almost a year ago, I submitted an article to a very popular website for single moms to be a contributing writer.  I was accepted as a writer, but did not submit any contributions other than my first article. Today I received an email from the owner of the blog wanting to use my article as part of a Mother's Day celebration week on the website! How is that for confirmation? I really don't know what it means or what the future holds in regard to me writing, but I will say this: writing energizes me and makes me feel alive.  Who doesn't want to do something that brings them to life? Did I say earlier I had just been schlepping though life? Yeah I was, but no more.